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Topic: How to be equitable when giving gifts to one's children?
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 Rafiyq.Mondesir
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AbuAbdillah Rafiyq ibn Mondesir the T
(USA)
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Member
Posts: 8
Joined: Apr 2003
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AsSalaamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullah.
I was wondering if anyone knows if any of the ulemaa have expounded upon the fiqh of giving gifts to one's children and/or step-children?
Specifically, i was wondering about the following: If one gives his 6 year old son an allowance of $4 per week, should he also give his younger two children (males, ages 2 and 3 months) the exact same amount of money even though they (the younger children) are not yet cognizant of value of money?
What if one of the children is considerably older than the next in line, such that the eldest is 12 and the next child is 6 years old? Should the allowance given be the same amount?
Any help in this matter would be greatly appreciated, walHamdulillah.
BaarakAllah feekum.
- AbuAbdillah Rafiyq ibn Mondesir the Trinidadian
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| s.bint.ahmed
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Umm AbdurRahmaan S.bint Ahmed ibn Suleimaan
(U.K)
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Member
Posts: 116
Joined: Sep 2002
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walaikum salaam,
Below an excellent and concise booklet in English By Shaikh Muhammed
al- Uthaimeen there is a section particular to the Rights of the children.
It explains the fairness between children and provides a hadeeth to an instance of injustice. Then explains instances when it is permissible to differ in treatment when there is a specific need ie, medical care.
There are a couple of translations of this booklet in English. The titles being slightly different.
*1. Rights Basic to Natural Human Constitution, and Affirmed by Divine Law. Published in 1415/1994.
2. Essential Rights that the Pure, Innate Nature calls for but Islaam Requires from Muslims. Published in 1415/1994
The *first booklet listed is a clearer and easier to read translation.
Also the Book - 'Islaamic Fataawa Regarding The Muslim Child '
There are fataawa by Shaikh ibn Bazz, Shaikh Uthaimeen, Shaikh al- Fawzaan in the Book:
Chapter eleven ...Regarding Good Upbringing... Fairness between children.(Pg 127.
www.SalafiBookstore.com
This message was edited by s.bint.ahmed on 5-18-04 @ 9:24 PM
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| wasim.ahmed
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Abu 'Abdil 'Azeez Waseem ibn Abdirraheem Al Peshimaam
(Bangalore,India / Al Qaseem , K.S.A)
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Member
Posts: 221
Joined: Nov 2003
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al-Hamdu-Lillaahi Rabbil-'Aalameen was-Salaatu was-Salaamu 'alaa
Ashrafil-Anbiyaa?e wal-Mursaleen, wa ba'd:
as-Salaam 'alaykum wa-Rahmatullaahi wa-Barakaatuhu,
Q: Is it allowed for a mother to treat one of her children or grandchildren more favorably than the others, even though they all treat her the same.
A: The parent must treat them equally, without giving preference to any of them, neither in giving, spending money or gifts. This is due to the saying of the Prophet (sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam) -
"Fear Allaah and be just among your children."
Al-Bukhari no.6768 and Muslim no.62
The Major Scholars recommend one to be so equitable, that he greets them all and smiles in all of their faces in the same way, just to follow the command (in the previous Hadith). Sometimes, though, it is allowed for the father to prefer a sick child or the youngest child, if the circumstances call for the extra love and care. But the general rule remains - that the parents treat equally their children in all matters, especially if they are all equally dutiful and obedient.
Source : Fataawaa Islaamiyyah, Vol 7.
Fatwa by : Ibn Jibreen
Abu 'Abdullaah Waseem Ahmad ibn 'Abd Al Raheem Alhindee
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16-05-2004 @ 2:05 AM
