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Topic: Women kissing cheeks when saying assalamu alaikum
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 vtorres
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Member
Posts: 28
Joined: Sep 2002
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assalamu alaikum
I went to a masjid near my city this past weekend. When I extended my hand to a sister to give her salaams she pulled me close kissed my right cheek ....then my left...then my right...then my left again. This is new to me. And then EVERY OTHER SISTER IN THAT MASJID DID THE SAME TO ME. Can someone tell me if that is an innovation, custom, or what? Is it permissable to do or not?
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| faruq.as-salafi
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Member
Posts: 259
Joined: Sep 2002
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Walaykum Salaam.
The same is done so in Cleveland. You see this as well as the right-left-right head movement without the kissing, a muslim salaams a muslim from a distance and puts his hand over his heart, or shakes his hand and then puts his hand over his heart and other acts that I have yet to find their place in the authentic sunnah. Can the people of knowledge please respond to the initial question.
I found the answer to my second sight on www.fatwa-online.com:
-The ruling regarding kissing the hand or placing in on the chest after shaking hands-
"From what we know, there is no basis for this action in the Sharee'ah. Kissing the hand or placing it upon the chest after shaking hands has not been legislated. Instead, if one doing so believes it to draw him near to Allah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) then it is (considered) an innovation."
-Shaykh Ibn Baaz
al-Bid'u wal-Muhdathaat wa maa laa asla lahu-Page 477
I asked someone why they did this and they responded that the gesture means that "Islam is in the heart."
Baarak-Allaahu Feekum - wa sal-Allaahu wa-sallam 'alaa Nabiyyinaa Muhammad,
was-Salaam 'alaykum wa-Rahmatullaahe wa-Barakaatuh.
Abu' Salafi'ayn
As-Salafiyoon in Cleveland
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| vtorres
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Member
Posts: 28
Joined: Sep 2002
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I dont know if this is authentic, I found this on a website doing a search :
The narrative ascribed to the Prophet (sallallaahu alayhi wasallam) that you have referred to is reported by Tirmizi (Kita?b al-Istiza?n wa al-A?da?b) and Ahmad ibn Hanbal in his "Musnad".
A person asked the Prophet (sallallaahu alayhi wasallam): When one of us meets his bretheren or his friends should he bow for them? The Prophet said: No. He asked: Should he hug them or kiss them? The Prophet replied: No. He asked: Should he shake their hands? The Prophet (sallallaahu alayhi wasallam) said: Yes. (as reported in Tirmizi)
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| amr.basheer
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Member
Posts: 105
Joined: Oct 2002
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-What is clearly legislated in the shareeah is to shake hands [one hand each and not two] whether it is upon greeting [which is a sunnah] or departing [which is a recommended act]. The prophet mentioned in the hadeeth that you quoted, which was authenticated by al-albaanee, the correct way is to shake hands. And in that is the reward and also there is the hadeeth of hudaifah reported by at-tabaraani in his awsat [book of hadeeth] that he said,
?when the believer meets another believer, says salam to him and then shakes his hand, then their sins will be wiped off like the leaves falling of a tree.?
Refer to Silsalah al-ahaadeeth as-saheehah p51-53
-And the ruling for men is the same for women
-As for kissing on the cheeks then this is a custom, more common amongst the arabs, and there isn?t anything to actually forbid it as a custom.
-for your personel dilemma you need to educate yourself and others, as it seems those people are ignorant of this sunnah. And inshallaah, you will be rewarded every time they implement this sunnah.
-and if you then encounter problems enjoining the good in this issue, it is better to return to any scholar for advice.
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| abdulilah
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Member
Posts: 327
Joined: Sep 2002
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The above quoted hadeeth by vtores is the same one Sheikh al Banna always mentions when someone tries to kiss his head rather he says the sunnah is shake the hand when meeting unless the person has come from a long journey, etc. In this case one can even stand up for them to hug as the Messenger sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said "stand up for your brother". However even this is misunderstood in many gatherings where a man may stand up for someone to honour them and this is not correct.
Sheikh Rabee' last Wednesday was also approached by a brother who wanted to kiss his head but he said from the sunnah is to shake hands when meeting somoene such that the sins are forgiven so long as you are shaking his/her hands.
Also it is not permissable for a man to shake a women hands if he is not mahram for her and vice versa for would any one of you like a hot iron rod to be pierced into his/her head.
Also when departing it is sufficient to shake hands for hugging eachother when departing is not from the sunnah as many of the people fall into it. This was explained by Sheikh Fawzee al Atharee. And Allaah knows best.
التراجع إلى الحق فضيلة
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| Moosaa
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Member
Posts: 1280
Joined: Sep 2002
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from an earlier thread:
"I [Moosaa] also asked him [Shaykh M. Baazmool] about shaking hands when departing, and he said that "it has no asl (foundation) in the Sunnah, doing it all the time is bid'ah, thinking that it is part of the Deen and worshipping Allaah with it is bid'ah, however if it happens sometimes with no intention of it being part of the Deen, then it is no problem..."
http://www.salafitalk.net/st/viewmessages.cfm?Forum=10&Topic=296
and amr basheer said, jazaahullaahu khayran:
-What is clearly legislated in the shareeah is to shake hands [one hand each and not two] whether it is upon greeting [which is a sunnah] or departing [which is a recommended act]. The prophet mentioned in the hadeeth that you quoted, which was authenticated by al-albaanee, the correct way is to shake hands. And in that is the reward and also there is the hadeeth of hudaifah reported by at-tabaraani in his awsat [book of hadeeth] that he said,
?when the believer meets another believer, says salam to him and then shakes his hand, then their sins will be wiped off like the leaves falling of a tree.?
Refer to Silsalah al-ahaadeeth as-saheehah p51-53"
I benefitted greatly by this reference to the book of Imaam Al-Albaanee, so may Allaah reward you well.
In it (p.52), Al-Albaanee, rahimahullaah, mentions that shaking hands is legislated when departing from each other, mentioning the generality of the proof of the hadeeth of bidding farewell to the traveller, taking him by his hand. To further support this, he mentioned another hadeeth:
(( From the completion/perfection of the greeting is handshaking. )) [At-Tirmithee and others]
The shaykh initially saw this hadeeth of At-Tirmithee as being fit to use as a proof because of its numerous supporting routes, but after further review, he concluded, may Allaah increase his reward, that none of the routes can possibly be used to strengthen each other due to their severe weakness and not fulfilling the conditions to be shawaahid. Therefore his final word on this hadeeth: dha'eef. He then brought it in Silsilatul-Ahaadeethid-Dha'eefah #1288 along with an extensive discussion of its chains, from the clear knowledge and precise research that Allaah cause to eminate from the shaykh, zaadahu Allaahu thawaaban.
I hope someone would comment on this statement of mine below:
It seems to me that the Shaykh later inserted the sentence:
ثم تتبعت طرقه... ولذلك أوردته في السلسلة الأخرى #1277
and did not edit his original kalaam, because right after this, he says:
ووجه الاستدلال بل الاستشهاد به...
Which denotes that he was using it as a proof or a shaahid. I believe this statement was left over from when he originally wrote the section, and when he added the clarification about the weakness of the hadeeth, he did not edit what was immediately afterwards.
Can anyone take a look at that and see if my conclusion is reasonable? This is all on page 52 of volume one, the third faa'idah.
Then the shaykh, rahimahullaah, finishes:
"And as for those that say, "Shaking hands when departing is a bid'ah," this is something that has no angle of proof for it.
Na'am, the one who comes accross the related narrations about shaking hands when arriving, he finds that they are more in number and stronger than the narrations reported about shaking hands when departing. So whoever is a faqeehun-Nafs (?) concludes from this that the second handshaking does not have the same religious status as the first. The first one is sunnah, and the other is mustahabb, and as for it being bid'ah, then no, it is not, due to the evidence we have mentioned." [1/53 of the Silsilah]
I am not meaning to be redundant here, I know that the brother Amr had already reviewed this, and basically summarized Al-Albaanee's position quite well, but what I have a problem understanding here is this:
The very hadeeth that the Shaykh Al-Albaanee, may Allaah give us his company in the Firdows, uses to tie the word tahiyyah to musaafahah, is a dha'eef hadeeth as he had later ruled. All the other proofs he mentioned are only general about tahiyyah or salaam, and they do not mention musaahafah. So the hadeeth which binds the two affairs together (tahiyyah, musaafahah) is the hadeeth which is not authentic.
So was Al-Albaanee's original conclusion based on an evidence that he later saw to be weak and unfit for use as a proof? Or did he still see the validity of shaking hands when leaving despite the weakness of that one hadeeth?
I lean towards the first one. Any thoughts?
Moosaa
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سبحانك اللهم وبحمدك
أشهد أن لا إله إلا أنت
أستغفرك وأتوب إليك
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| Moosaa
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Member
Posts: 1280
Joined: Sep 2002
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On a lighter note...
I just had a memory of my first 'eed prayer in Pittsburgh! I was a new Muslim and when the prayer was over, everybody got up and starting hugging each other three times each. Arabs, Pakastanis, Americans black and white, etc. We were all bouncing off each other like robots. I just followed along since I did not know anything about Islaam at that time. Someone would just look at me, come to me and hug me on the right side, saying "SubhaanAllaah", then on the left, "Laa ilaaha ill Allaah", and then on the right, "Allaahu akbar" And we all just kept doing that until we had bounced off of each and every person in the masjid. And we wouldn't stop until we had made sure that there was no one left in the masjid that we had not bounced off of. That took about 15 min or so! And some people I had just talked to them at Fajr prayer and they were hugging me three times! Due to this, I understood that this was from the things that Muslims have to do after the 'Eed prayer!!!
Al-Hamdulillaah, the one who enligtened us with knowledge of the Sunnah.
Another thing that came to my mind is that when I first came to Makkah, I really admired the Soodaanee teachers who would not allow people to hug them. Some of the 'arab men are a little too "kissy" and the Soodaanees are very manly from their culture. They don't do all that pecking on the cheek that other arabs do. I loved it when a brother went to greet one of the teachers and the teacher just put a firm outstretched hand on the brothers shoulder and basically halted him from a distance, at the same time receiving him in a friendly manner. It was like he was saying, "We don't need all that huggy-kissy stuff."
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سبحانك اللهم وبحمدك
أشهد أن لا إله إلا أنت
أستغفرك وأتوب إليك
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| vtorres
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Member
Posts: 28
Joined: Sep 2002
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assalamu alaikum
So to make sure I have this correct....
Its sunnah to shake hands, but there isnt really anything wrong with them kissing the cheeks because its just custom?
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21-11-2002 @ 12:00 AM
22-11-2002 @ 12:00 AM