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ibn.muhammad
17-09-2002 @ 12:00 AM    Notify Admin about this post
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I think the article you are talking about umm marwan is another one. The one on Fear and Hope is here.

http://www.spubs.com/sps/sp.cfm?subsecID=TRB01&articleID=TRB010001&articlePages=1

It is an excellent article from al-Ibanah of Ibn Battah I think.

This message was edited by ibn.muhammad on 9-17-02 @ 5:44 PM

umm_abdillah
17-09-2002 @ 12:00 AM    Notify Admin about this post
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Assalam Aleikum Warahmatullah

JazakAllahu Khairan Umm marwan for the article.  BarakAllahu Fik.

Assalam Aleikum  

Alhamdulillah ala Islam wa Sunnah!

ummmarwan
17-09-2002 @ 12:00 AM    Notify Admin about this post
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assalamu alaikum, (for umm_abdillah) There is a very good article on the need to balance fear with love and hope at salafipublications.com article ID no. SCL010003 by Abu Iyaad.

umm_khadijah
17-09-2002 @ 12:00 AM    Notify Admin about this post
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Assalamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,

Jazak Allah hu khairan brother Iyaad for the excellent naseehah,and also to the other replies,may Allah reward u all with jannah for your efforts ameen.
Brother Iyaad u almost brought tears to my eyes with what u said as it is so true.I will take all of your advice insha Allah,i know i have to increase more in du'a and dhikr insha Allah and try to become more patient,may Allah help me.
As i said in my message this is causing alot of problems in my life,sometimes it realy seems unbearable,especially when i think of it happening and i know i shouldnt look to the future as Allah is the only knower of the Ghaib(unseen).And it makes me very upset.I think a brother replied and mentioned me telling my husband,this is very hard for me,as with him knowing,it would make me much more anxious,as he would then be aware of my fear,but i have considered telling him but im not sure if he would properly understand,Allah hu Alim,maybe if Allah makes me strong i will insha Allah.
Brother Iyad,u said that it would be permissable for me to seek councelling,are u sure i would not be committing shirk by doing this,as i would be asking them for help,but like i said i know Allah is the only one who can cure me,and if they were to help me at all,my thanks would all be to Allah.Also i read about another woman who had the same fear and she underwent hypnotherapy treatment,which she said helped her to get over her phobia alot,i have wanted to know for a while if this is permissable or not,please could u find out for me?Jazak Allah hu khairan for the advice.


Assalamu Alaykum wa rahmatullah.

umm_abdillah
16-09-2002 @ 12:00 AM    Notify Admin about this post
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Assalam Aleikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh

JazakAllahu Khairan Bro. Abu Iyaad for the advice.

Bro. I seem to have a similar thing, and that is I fear death. Alhamdulillah, I've always thought of death often, I always strive to remember it, since the prophet (sallahu aleyhi wa sallam) adviced us to remember often, the terminator of pleasures.  But, nowadays, I fear it sooo much, and it's a very overwhelming feeling.  Because, I'm afraid to sleep for fear that the angel of death will come and take my soul.  I'm afraid to go out, for fear of being hit by a car.  I know that every soul will taste death, and that death will come to all of us, anywhere and at any time.  So my question is, how do I still live life, knowing this reality?

And the sad thing is that I find that this has not caused me to come closer to Allah, rather I seem to have less of a yearning to meet Allah.  And this is because I fear the grave and I fear that I'll die and Allah is not pleased with me.  Also, I have a young child, I fear to die and to leave him whilst his young.

Bro. Abu Iyaad or anyone please help me in dealing with this feeling.  Jazakumullahu Khairan.TextText

Alhamdulillah ala Islam wa Sunnah!

abu.iyaad
16-09-2002 @ 12:00 AM    Notify Admin about this post
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..--=ahamdulillaah was. salaatu was. salaamu `alaa rasoolillaah.=--..
wa. ba`ad
-----\|/-----


Naseehah

It is most likely that you have a waswasah from Shaytaan who has exaggerated the fear of sickness (illness) to you, and thus this concern in your mind has begun to pre-occupy most of your thoughts. Sometimes this can happen to people in other issues. I'll give you some examples. A sister would take an hour or so to perform wudhoo` due to  a suspicion that she had not washed her hands properly. So out of the fear of nullifying her prayer, she would go back and forth and keep washing her hands. Similarly a brother would spend up to two hours performing wudhoo, then going for prayer, then coming back and doing wudhoo again (before having even prayed) and so on, and finally he does not pray dhuhr until well after 3.00pm. So he he had a suspicion that he might have leaked some urine, and then this suspicion overwhelmed him, and led him to this strange behaviour. These cases appear to be waswasah (whispering) from Shaytaan, with an exaggerated fear of missing out on something that is `Ibaadah.

In your case however, the fear that you have is one that relates to a matter that is kawnee (a wordly affair). Firstly, you should know that Allaah is the one who brings about illness and the one who heals and cures. Thus, the  fear should not be focused around the illness or sickness, but it should be focused around Allaah `Azza wa Jall. The fear of the sickness itself should naturally follow on from the fear of Allaah, just like hope in the cure of sickness should naturally follow on from the hope of Allaah, who cures and heals.

So you need to shift the focus of your fear inshaa`Allaah ta`aalaa, and the ways to do this have been covered by the brother and sister (may Allaah reward them well) in the two posts above. Recite the Qur'aan and reflect upon it and know and understand Allaah's Names and Attributes and how they relate to the Creation, and place your reliance and trust upon Allaah, who is an-Naafi` (the one who benefits) and who is ad-Daarr (the one who causes harm). So He is to be exclusively feared and hoped in.

However, this does not mean that your fear of sickness comprises Shirk, since fear is of different types, and fear of the worldly harms is something natural to humans. In this case, it appears that the fear has been exaggerated to cause undue anxiety and worry and mental pre-occupation.

Then after that there is no harm if you seek councelling, as this is not considered Shirk, since you know that Allaah cures and heals, and you rely upon Him for that. However, you must also adopt the ways and means, and one of those ways and means, is to seek councelling from those who are worthy and fit of giving it.

Inshaa`Allaah ta`aalaa, you can also make the du`a "Allaahumma Innee A`oodhu bika min al-Hammi wal-Huzni..." which is part of the du`a in which you seek refuge in eight things. You can find it in the well-known du`a books. It translates as "O Allaah I seek refuge in you from anxiety and sadness". And as Ibn al-Qayyim explains Badaa`i al-Fawaaid, 1/446-447, al-hamm (anxiety) is worry and stress concerning something in the future and al-huzn is sorrow and grief concerning what has occurred in the past, and both of these are a form of torment and punishment of the soul. So we seek refuge from both of these.

And if any other members have any advice to give then, please come forward with it, as giving advice when a Muslim asks for it, is one of the six rights of a Muslim.

Allaah knows best. May Allaah safeguard us and you and the Muslimeen from the likes of these affairs.


.-=abu.iyaad=-.
--as.salafi--


This message was edited by abu.iyaad on 9-16-02 @ 9:39 PM

oummou.assia
16-09-2002 @ 12:00 AM    Notify Admin about this post
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bissmillahi rahmani rahim
assalam alaykoum ya oukhti fi llah
may Allah help u through this really stressing "illness" u got.
My simple advice would be :
1) that you make your dhikr on morning ( when waking up) and evening
2) making you dhikr when you go to bed
3) also when you go out, to the toilets, etc...
and all the situations of life.
You can find this dhikr in several books which are sold in common libraries ( look for books which are only based on kitaab wa sounnah sahiha : u find the ahadith from boukhary, mouslim, etc..)
4) remember to read also ayatul Kursy before going to sleep , after you dhikr of prayer, etc...
5) make a lot of dou'a to ALLAh for what u are going through , so that He will take this off ur mind.
6) make the dou'a in the case where you are sad, or feel bad, it will really help u sis.

Also, when you have those bad thoughts, take refuge  in Allah against shaytan irrajim ( la3natou llah alayhi).
Read Qoran,it is a cure. Mostly soora al fatiha, and the last 3 ones, and ayaat from soora al baqarah.
May Allah help you remove all these shaytani wiswas.ameen
wa assalam alaykoum sis.



umm_khadijah
15-09-2002 @ 12:00 AM    Notify Admin about this post
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Assalamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,
Im a bit embarrassed about speaking of this,i dont want anyone to think im crazy! insha Allah.
Basically i need some sincere advise,as i have developed what they call a 'phobia'of being sick(physically),i first developed this when i was about 14 yrs old,maybe because me and my family moved to a new area,started it off Allah hu Alim,i then used to see a councellor who i would talk it over with,i hadnt been sick for about 10-11 yrs alhamdulillah,so the phobia wasnt there as much then,but about 7 mths ago i was and it has started it all off again,im constantly worrying about it,it has even started to affect my family life,such as with my husband as im scared with him being here incase he gets ill and passes it to me,he is actually now working away, but it came realy close to divorce and the main problem behind it was this fear of mine,so i know shaytaan is having a whale of a time with it.Also i have two children alhamdulillah and im always worrying about them getting ill and if i would be able to cope when they do.Also it is starting to affect me going out,i try not to go out that much anyway,but when i do im always thinking are we going to catch anything to make us ill,whoever's reading this may be thinking this sister needs to stop worrying so much,but wallahi its not that easy,im constantly anxious about it,and it does make me depressed sometimes at the thought of it happening,even though i know it would be the Qadr of Allah.I do ask Allah to take this fear from me,and i know i have to be patient,but believe me this is so hard,and i fear it could cause more problems between me and my husband and also for my children as i would love to insha Allah send them to school when they are old enough,but the thought of them going and possibly catching something,is realy putting me off.i need to speak with someone about this problem,maybe who could tell me how to cope with it and how to get it off my mind etc,i know that Allah is the only one who can cure me of this,and what has stopped me so far of going to someone proffesional who deals with these phobias is my fear of commiting shirk,can anyone tell me if i would be doing that,and if it would be permissable to see someone,im realy desperate,before this takes over my life,which it is realy trying to do.sorry this is so long,but i would be grateful if anyone could advise me on this on how to go about it,and if it would be permissable to see a councellor to talk about this.Jazak Allah hu khairan for taking the time to read this.

Assalamu Alaykum wa rahmatullah.

This message was edited by um_dawud on 3-30-03 @ 11:35 PM

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